3 TOP TIPS TO RAISE A CONFIDENT CHILD  

By Sally Forrest

Managing Director, SoulKids, www.soulkids.org

21st May 2018

One of the most attractive qualities a person can have is self-confidence.

It starts young and it is a skill worth learning.

One of the core principles of SoulKids is that confidence is a teachable and learnable skill.

Here are 3 top tips that you can start with for your child (and of course for yourself):

1) CULTIVATE POSITIVE THINKING

At any moment, we have a choice. We can see the good in a situation, or we can see the bad. No matter what the situation, develop the habit of thinking “What positives can I find in this situation?”

For example, if your child brings home their grade card and 4 subjects are above average and 2 are below average, do not over-react and start to focus on the negatives.

Instead treat each moment as a learning opportunity.

Ask your child what went well, and how they feel about those subjects. Also ask your child what did not go well and why that was. Ask your child for their action steps to make improvements going forwards.

You can also encourage the child to take accountability for their own success. This way the conversation is positive and productive and you do not react to the disappointment of a few low grades.

2) VISUALIZE POSITIVE OUTCOMES

At SoulKids we believe that Visualization is a powerful tool to use.

Encourage your child to learn the art of visualizing positive outcomes in all aspects of their life.

Visualize doing well in school exams.

Visualize winning at sports.

Visualize having a healthy body.

Visualize having great friends.

Once the mind visualizes a positive outcome, the body responds, your child will begin to feel more confident and will take more positive actions, which naturally will have better results than taking action half-heartedly.

The child will develop confidence in this technique with practice. The more you practice doing positive visualizations, the easier it becomes.

3) CREATE A NETWORK OF SUPPORTIVE FRIENDS

At SoulKids we coach children on the truth that ‘You become who you surround yourself with’ and this is very important to understand if you want to have a positive life and future.

Who your child mixes with, will play a large role in their life.

If your child mixes with friends who encourage and support them, then they will become more confident and grounded in life.

If your child gets in with the wrong crowd and starts to do things to please others, then they are in effect moving away from their own personality and confidence.

It is important to explain to a child early the importance of relationships and what to nurture in them. Encourage positive friends and discuss with your child how these relationships will indeed support them going forwards in life.

These are 3 simple SoulKids tips that are easy to implement and that will make a positive difference in the lives of your children.

Your child learns best from experience, so become a role model in these aspects and your child will learn from your actions.

Sally Forrest is the founder of SoulKids.

If you would like your child to benefit from a SoulKids program, a personal coaching or by reading the SoulKids books, then please do connect on www.soulkids.org

The next SoulKids Self-Confidence program is coming up on 11 / 12  / 13 June. An ideal moment for your child to grow self-confidence and have fun during the school holidays at the same time.

For registration, click here.

One on One coaching sessions can be booked at your convenience by contacting the SoulKids Manager, Vidhya on soulkids@soulcentre.org.

3 Secrets To Raising A Happy Child

 

3 Secrets To Raising A Happy Child

By Vikas Malkani

Founder of SoulKids®

Raising happy children is the goal of every parent. Children are naturally drawn towards happiness, and as parents, we must understand what it takes to nurture and raise a happy child.

Here are my top 3 secrets to raising a happy child.

1.    Feed their self-confidence

As parents, it is our responsibility to raise our child’s sense of self-esteem so high that nothing or no one can break it.

Boost their confidence by always encouraging them to try new things. Appreciate their efforts not just the results. Support their interests, desires and strengths. Encourage them to do more of the things they are naturally good at. This provides a positive reinforcement and helps them grow in confidence; it also strengthens them to produce positive results in their endeavors.

Make sure that you do not compare them with others. Comparisons with peers devalues their self-confidence and also affects their inner beliefs.

2.    Make your home a positive one

Children learn more by imitation than by instruction. Be aware of your words, actions and behavior and keep them positive, as your children are watching you constantly.

Engage in fun activities together. Develop a positive and happy mindset yourself so they learn by watching you.

Let them see you making mistakes, learning from it and moving forward. Encourage open communication so they know they can always come to you for guidance and not be judged.

3.    Inspire, don’t perspire your children

Motivate children, don’t dictate to them. Acknowledge and reinforce good work and behavior. Notice them doing things right, don’t just catch them doing things wrong.

Encourage them to make small efforts and support them. It is always the small victories that lead to greater ones.

Children learn best through positive and constructive feedback. Remember failure has a purpose too – it shows you what you need to work on. Help them develop this growth mindset.

The award winning SoulKids® programs are designed to give children the life-skills they need to create their own happiness and success.

At SoulKids, children learn skills such as resilience, emotional intelligence, teamwork, personal leadership, creative problem solving and more in a fun and engaging environment. They always leave happy, excited, positive and wanting more.

We offer group programs for different age groups and also offer one-on-one coaching to provide specific help and guidance for your child.

Click here to see SoulKids program dates and register http://www.soulkids.org/events

Vikas Malkani is an authority on personal development, happiness and success. He has coached CEO’s, Hollywood Stars, Royalty, Sports Champions and more…

SoulKids is an award winning life skills program that makes children future-ready by teaching them leadership, resilience, emotional intelligence, teamwork and more.

Find out more about SoulKids programs and one-on-one coaching here www.soulkids.org or email us at info@soulcentre.org

Count your Blessings to ensure a happy start for 2017

Vikas Malkani
9th January 2017

 

Count your Blessings to start the year right!

‘Counting your Blessings’ is one of the essential pillars of my teaching. My students will know why, as I have explained the many reasons spiritually, scientifically and practically too…

Try it for yourself and see the difference that being focused on your blessings makes in your life. I can guarantee that counting your blessings will make you happier, healthier, energetically attractive and will encourage a positive mindset that is resilient and able to handle challenges.

By counting your blessings you raise yourself energy levels, you attract more blessings and you experience all the goodness that a meditative mind brings. After all, counting your blessings is a technique of meditation and mindfulness from ancient times…

So start 2017 in a positive, peaceful and powerful manner – by counting your blessings with me.

Here are my top 5 blessings as I start 2017 -

1) I am blessed to be alive and have good health

2) I am blessed to be surrounded by wonderful people and friends

3) I am blessed to do work I love and share wisdom with the world

4) I am blessed I have recently enjoyed some time off and seen the beauty of our wonderful planet

5) I am blessed to be living and working in Singapore and meeting great people every day at SoulCentre®!

I’ve shared mine with you, what are your top 5 blessings?

To make 2017 a great year for yourself, connect with SoulCentre® and get started with meditation, mindfulness, reiki or start coaching yourself to a life of happiness, prosperity and fulfilment.

Attend a ‘Life Lessons with Vikas’ on 18 January or ‘Meditation Made Simple’ starting 07 February and start to make your life better in all ways.

Connect with us at info@soulcentre.org to find out more.

www.soulcentre.org

Self-Confidence In Children – 5 Ways To Create It

By Vikas Malkani

Founder of SoulKids®

31st October 2016

Contrary to what some believe, self-confidence doesn’t develop simply by telling kids they're wonderful, special, and unique. Simple words will not do it, nor will giving every child a trophy at the end of every contest.

The reality is that your child will face competition in life and must learn how to manage it. Regardless of the result, when children compete, they can see that their own preparation and hard work makes a difference. Getting a prize contributes to self-confidence only when the child knows they have earned it.

A positive self-confidence is one of the greatest gifts you can give your child. The self-confidence a child develops is the result of numerous experiences that help a child feel accepted, loved, respected, capable and effective. And it is always built over time.

www.soulkids.org

SoulKids® teaches that children with high self-esteem feel loved and competent and develop into happy, productive people. They tend to feel valued and accepted, feel proud of a job well done, think good things about themselves and feel prepared for everyday challenges.

Conversely, children with low self-esteem often feel self-critical and are hard on themselves, feel insecure, or not as good as other kids, focus on the times they fail rather than the times they succeed, lack confidence to step out of their comfort zone, and constantly doubt their ability to do well at things.

At SoulKids® we believe that self-confidence is important because when children feel good about themselves, it sets them up for success — in everything from school to friendships. Positive self-confidence helps children try new challenges, cope with mistakes, and try again. In contrast, children with low self-confidence feel unsure of themselves, think others won't accept them, and may allow themselves to be treated poorly and have a hard time standing up for themselves.

Here are 5 SoulKids® tips to help your child develop self-confidence :

1) Help your child learn to do things - At every age, there are new things for kids to learn. When a child does something new, it gets them out of their zone of comfort and into their zone of discovery and growth; it makes them grow. Doing new things is absolutely essential for the constant development of a child and also great for building their self-confidence.

When teaching kids how to do things, show and help them at first. Then let them do what they can, even if they make mistakes. Be sure your child has lots of opportunities to learn, try, and feel proud. Don't make new challenges too easy — or too hard.

2) Praise your child, but do it wisely - It's good to praise children and your praise is a way to show that you love them and are proud of them too. But research shows that some ways of praising kids can actually backfire so avoid over-praising. Praise that doesn't feel earned is not beneficial and in fact can have the reverse effect. Kids are masters at detecting insincere praise or baseless compliments.

Praise your child often, but be specific in your compliments so your words sound and feel true. Telling a child he played a great game when he knows he didn't feels hollow and fake. So it's better to say, "I know that wasn't your best performance, but we all have off days. I'm proud of you for not giving up. Tomorrow, you'll be back on your top game."

At SoulKids® we believe that it’s better to praise the efforts they make rather than just the results they achieve. This kind of praise encourages children to put effort into things, work toward goals, and try. When kids do that, they are more likely to succeed.

3) Ban negative criticism - The messages kids hear about themselves from others easily translate into how they feel about themselves. Harsh words such as ‘You're so lazy’ are harmful, and not motivating at all. When children absorb negative messages about themselves, especially from the parents or family, they feel bad about themselves, and act accordingly.

Never belittle your child's feelings. If you get angry take a short break so you don't say anything you'll regret later. And remember, you can dislike a child's actions without disliking the child.

Words have power, so be conscious of what you speak to and around your child.

4) Focus on strengths - Pay attention to what your child does well and enjoys. Make sure your child has opportunities to develop these strengths. Developing their innate strengths will feel natural and joyful for your child.

For developing positive self-confidence, nurturing strengths is better than focusing on weaknesses if you want to help kids feel good about themselves and succeed in life.

5) Be a good role model - When you put effort into everyday tasks like making a meal, cleaning up the dishes, or washing the car, you're setting a good example for your children. Your child learns to put effort into doing homework, cleaning up toys, or making the bed because they see you so the same.

Modelling the right mind set and attitude counts, too. When you do tasks cheerfully, or when you avoid rushing through chores and take pride in a job well done, you teach your child to do the same.

The SoulKids® creed is simple and effective – ‘Be what you want your child to become!’

It works, every time!

SoulKids is an award-winning training program of essential life-skills for children.

To have your child benefit from our next class, click http://www.soulkids.org/events

Leadership for Children – SoulKids®

Sally Forrest

24^th October 2016

The right skills learned at a young age are priceless and leadership is vital to the future success for all children.

At SoulKids® we encourage each child to bring out their very best and during the programs they take on leadership roles.

One of the main lessons for a leader is that you lead by example – this means how you communicate, how you walk, how you hold yourself - all makes a difference.

Children are given roles where they soon realize the importance of clear communication and of setting a good example in order to succeed.

They are exposed to team activities where the teams are allocated randomly; sometimes they lead and other times they are part of a team.

This is a true test of working with people not like you, people who may have different strengths than you, and people who you may not have picked for your team should you be given the choice.

Negotiation, getting along with others, looking for the strengths in others - are all valuable lessons that children experience and lessons that set the foundation for success in life.

Confident communication, negotiations skills, positive thinking, planning and focus are all vital to success and all lessons that children learn through fun, games, stories and experiential learning.

Once connected with our SoulKids® family there are many exciting opportunities open for children to learn.

We select children to become SoulKids® Ambassadors and they feature on videos inspiring children with the wisdom they have learned and applied in their own life.

We encourage social entrepreneurial projects and work with children to achieve their dreams.

SoulKids® is more than an enrichment class, it is a family for life where children feel loved, comfortable and know that they will be encouraged to step outside their comfort zone and to bring out their very best self to every occasion in life.

Do connect with us to register your child for our upcoming programs or for one on one coaching.

Life-Skills – The Benefits Of Becoming A SoulKids® Mentor

Sally Forrest

17^th October 2016

In 2004 SoulKids® was launched into Singapore with the goal to reach out to as many children as possible.

www.soulkids.org

Our humble beginnings started with a small team of dedicated Mentors who worked with children to teach essential life skills for happiness and success.

The parents of these initial children noticed significant changes in their children and they asked if they could also learn the SoulKids® secrets.

In 2007 SoulKids® Mentor Training was born.

Many dedicated and passionate men and women, from all walks of life, have undertaken the SoulKids® Mentor training.

Over 28 different nationalities have taken the SoulKids® Mentor training and each one enthuses at how effective SoulKids® is.

When adults come on the Mentor Training, little do they realize that they personally will get so much out of the life lessons and activities.

After all a key teaching is that you can only give to another person what you have inside of you- so learning essential life skills and applying them to your own life is the starting point.

So what do Mentors say about the training :

• It’s truly life changing and shows us a way of living life using a positive and supportive mindset.
• Thank you for sharing your specialness, uniqueness and awesomeness with me – you have truly changed my life.
• This training is a true eye opener- what you do is so inspiring and your vision is so clear.
• There are simply no words that describe how lives changing your wisdom is- thank you for being so generous and sharing such wonderful gifts.
• The atmosphere is unlike any training course I have attended- it’s supportive, inclusive and positive.
• I enjoyed the training, the stories and the lessons. Its truly life changing and I am so grateful to you for passing down the wisdom and keeping the truth so simple.
• I am a changed person having found SoulKids®. Thank you for showing me the light and for inspiring me on so many levels. I am thrilled to be a part of your team.
• There is no “agenda” apart from sincerely wanting to bring out the best in every person who attends the program.
• The way the children are taught is awe-inspiring. So much love, care and understanding. All children are included and in one day we witnessed such transformations that I would not have thought possible.
• The stories and games stay with you for life - I love them!

SoulKids® Mentor Training is conducted once a year by the founders Vikas Malkani and Sally Forrest. The next scheduled training is on 19- 23 February and the SoulKids® practical is on 25/26 February where you get to see the full program in action.

The places are limited to ensure one on one attention for each candidate - so please do connect with us to register your interest and to find out more.

We do have international students flying in for this event- so it will be truly special!

Connect with me personally on : sally@soulcentre.org

Self-Confidence – The Greatest Gift For Your Child

By Vikas Malkani, Founder of SoulKids

10 October 2106

What’s the best gift one can give to a child? I asked myself this question one day, many years ago…

Is it happiness, comforts of life, a good education, a supporting family, or fulfilling every desire the child has?

After much contemplation, I decided that the best gift one can give a child is the self-confidence, and the capability to raise their own self-belief when they need to.

In other words, if we are able to create a positive and self-confident child, we have done a large part of our work as parents.

www.soulkids.org

Let me give you my reasoning for this. There are 2 subjects I have studied deeply – happiness and success. Every human needs to experience these 2 outcomes in their life, for their life to feel fulfilled and worthy.

I have even written 2 best-selling books on these subjects – The Little Manual of Happiness and The Little Manual of Success. They are available here http://www.soulcentre.org/shop.html

One of my great realizations during my research was that for both success and happiness to manifest, one needs to develop a strong and positive self-esteem and build the capability to raise this self-confidence by choice when needed.

Life presents many challenges, and these storms come when we least expect them; if we don’t have a strong self-belief, we will be emotionally shaken and depressed and thus not able to tackle life with the optimal actions we must. Since actions bring results, without a strong self-confidence we are unable to create or enjoy an optimal life.

All successful children develop high self-esteem, and this is what sees them through difficult times when things and results are not what they expect.

Self-confidence builds resilience.

All happy children also demonstrate high and positive self-confidence. This allows them to protect their own happiness when the world around them does not offer the approval we seek.

Self-confidence builds an inner strength that can easily sail through the external storms of life.

For a happy and successful life, a high self-confidence is essential. The best gift you can give your child is training which empowers them to become a positive and confident child, able to handle whatever life throws at them.

You can start by sending your child to a SoulKids class, and see the positive difference it makes in them.

Check out the latest SoulKids courses here http://www.soulkids.org/events

Or you can gift your child the ‘SoulKids Book of Happiness for Teens’ – by Vikas Malkani, another of my best-selling books written specially for teenagers.

You can purchase it here http://www.soulkids.org/shop.html

Build a self-confident child and you would have given them the best gift you possibly can as a parent.

SoulKids is an award winning training program that provides the complete menu of life-skills that your child will require to create a life of happiness and success. SoulKids life-skills supplement the academic education that a child receives.

Life-Skills for Children - SoulKids®

This life-skills training has been a family journey -  Vidhya Shailesh

3rd October 

About four years ago, while waiting for my "Meditation Made Simple" class to begin, I happened to take a look at the SoulKids® flyer. Always drawn to wisdom, I was intrigued. Back then my daughter was eight years old and I felt she needed some help with her self-confidence. The flyer looked promising and I decided to sign her up for the weekend.

www.soulkids.org

When I told her about it, I realized she was very anxious. I reassured her that it would be a lot of fun. The weekend came and it had a huge impact on her. She wouldn't stop talking about the stories and she was visibly happier. As the weeks went by, she would keep recalling some of the stories and lessons. Her favorite story was the sunflower and the rose because it taught her that she was special. She was clearly feeling more self-assured and knew how to manage her fears.

All the SoulKids® talk at home got my younger son very interested and excited so I signed him up when he was just five and a half years old. This time it was my turn to be nervous - he was after all very small. But once again, I needn't have worried because I had a very happy and excited little boy after the session.

Watching the changes in the children, I decided to go through the mentor training myself. I wanted to be able to support their new learning myself and like every other parent, be the best parent I could be. I knew as the children got older, it was only the nature of issues that would change and I wanted to be able to handle them well.

The mentor training opened my eyes to a whole new way of parenting. I learnt not to hand down my limiting beliefs to my children. They had a potential of their own and I learnt that it was this potential that needed to be brought out.

I certified as a mentor and subsequently started working with SoulCentre®, conducting their SoulKids® programs.

After all these years, my children still get excited every time we talk about SoulKids®. The stories and lessons are often still discussed at home.

SoulKids® has given us lessons for life. And it is one program that we as a family vouch for. We have benefitted from it tremendously as have several other children and adults. I am privileged to be able to spread the teachings to other children through the SoulKids® classes. It has truly been and shall continue to be a family journey!

Thank you SoulKids®.

Coaching for Children - 3 reasons how coaching can benefit your child

25 September 2016

Vidhya Shailesh, the SoulKids® Manager was recently asked for her top tips on coaching and how it can benefit your child.

The children who experience coaching at SoulKids® really do enjoy their “me“ time and also enjoy their new focus and points of action as a result.

www.soulkids.org

TIP #1

Coaching provides a platform for a child to speak one-on-one with their coach. It provides a safe, friendly and happy environment where the child can discuss any issues they might be faced with. Children develop a personal relationship with their coaches and know that they can speak with them freely without being judged. In this way, seemingly minor issues can get addressed way before they become too big.

TIP #2

Once a personal/friendly relationship has been established, coaches can guide the children using tested methodology and help address specific issues. Coaches focus on the natural strengths of the children and guide them towards success. Coaching focuses on building a child’s self-esteem and boosts their sense of self-worth. Children become more receptive and learn when the environment is positive and nurturing. Their mindset changes and they understand how they can create change for themselves.

TIP #3

Coaches can also provide specific tasks and set time-bound goals for the children. Once the children understand that they are accountable, they follow through with appropriate action. The tasks are manageable, achievable and help the children take responsibility for their own growth. An ongoing relationship ensures that the learning is sustained and continuous guidance is provided for their overall growth. The child's emotional and mental well-being is the coach's highest priority. 

Life-Skills – Enrichment Classes – Support Your Child

September 19th 2016

SoulKids offers essential life–skills that support your child to succeed in life. Academic training is provided in all schools, however this is not enough for a child to really succeed in today’s world.

www.soulkids.org

To be truly happy and successful in life the following skills are needed :

•  Communication skills

•  Presentation skills

•  Behavioral skills such as how to deal with emotions

•  An understanding of ones strengths

•  An understanding of areas that need support

•  Leadership

•  How to be a team player

•  Self-belief

•  Self-confidence and self-esteem

•  An understanding of how to bring out the best in ones self

•  An understanding of how to bring out the best in others

•  Authenticity and honesty

All of these skills are learnt at SoulKids through fun – games – stories and experience.

Imagine having these skills and being able to apply them. These skills really do create a well-rounded, happy and balanced child.

SoulKids prepares children for the future and this starts from the age of 6.

Children who attend SoulKids from a young age really do mature into confident, self assured adults, who bring out the best in themselves and in others.

SoulKids Mentors stay in touch with its graduates and so children know that they always have a trusted friend they can turn to – for any issues that may arise on their journey of life.

This is truly the best gift you can give to your child.

Mentorship programs are also available for children from the age of 10, to support them during the critical teenage years.

Interview with SoulKids® Mentor - Jesmin Tan

Sally has been out and about interviewing the newly graduated SoulKids® Mentors. She recently met up with SoulKids® Mentor Jesmin Tan.

www.soulkids.org

Sally Forrest: What brought you to SoulCentre® & SoulKids®?

Jesmin Tan: I was searching for a quality program to engage my son for the school holidays as I did not want him to just have fun and not gain any real learnings. While searching for such a program on Google, I came across SoulKids® and was instantly interested.

SoulKids® was a good balance for him to have fun, mix with different children from various nationalities and at the same time learn how to increase his emotional resilience through the practice of a positive mind-set.

S: What was your experience of the SoulKids® Mentor Training (for adults) and the SoulKids® Weekend (for children)?

J: The Mentor training with Vikas Malkani was mentally intense but it was a fantastic experience. The sessions were presented in a systematic manner with simple but powerful lessons and statements which provoked self-reflections. The training also helped me to focus on what was important and what to be mindful of as an adult and parent.

Many stories were shared which made the learnings even more impactful. Being able to put in practice what was learnt in the mentor training with the kids for the SoulKids® weekend was also an eye opening and awesome experience for me.

S: How has SoulKids® benefited you as an individual?

J: By attending the SoulKids® Mentor Training and the weekend with children, I have definitely become more reflective, mindful when I am parenting and more importantly I am also learning to walk the talk. I keep an open mind and am being positive in my day to day engagements.

S: What is your most important lesson from the SoulKids® training?

J: My most important lesson has been - Every individual has the potential to reach their best, as long as they believe in themselves, get a great mentor to guide them, learn and take action.

S: What are your hopes / dreams and visions going forward?

J: A commitment that I will be a better parent and individual. I also want to be able to share my experience and journey of SoulKids® with others in order to help them achieve their personal best.

Low Self Esteem – How to support your child?

SoulKids teaches parents many skills and techniques to support their children if they ever face low self-esteem.

Here are some ways parents can help to raise self-esteem in their children.

5 Simple Tips to raise self-esteem in your children:

1. Keep your speech positive around your child. Be aware of what they hear from you and others in the family, because they imbibe and imitate what they hear.
2. Encourage your child to make small efforts, rather than take big leaps. Support their efforts when they make them and encourage them to do some more. Remember, small victories lead to greater ones.
3. Never compare your child. This habit is toxic to your child’s inner beliefs, and devalues the child’s self-esteem.
4. Do not dominate your child. If you are dominating and dictatorial, it weakens your child’s self-esteem. Either they will withdraw and become introverted, or they may rebel and swing the opposite way by becoming confrontational.
5. Avoid labelling your child in any way. Labels such as ‘you’re slow’, ‘you’re so dumb’ etc. are toxic to their self-belief.

Positive self-esteem in children helps them to become happy and successful, while low self-esteem will make them unhappy, sad or depressed.

High self-esteem leads to action, while low self-esteem will make them avoid taking actions. Since actions produce results, success is inevitably a result of high self-esteem.

SoulKids is an award-winning life skills program for children. Send your children to SoulKids and we will help them develop a positive and strong self-esteem.

We recommend all parents to attend our annual ‘SoulKids Mentor Training’ and learn SoulKids methods and secrets from Vikas Malkani himself.